


Toxic

by BrandonJT



Series: Black Hearts [1]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/F, Past Daniel Colter/Evil Queen | Regina Mills, Past Evil Queen | Regina Mills/Emma Swan, i want them to be happy too, im sorry everyone, this is angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-01
Updated: 2018-01-01
Packaged: 2019-02-26 10:51:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13234131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrandonJT/pseuds/BrandonJT
Summary: The girl had awakened something dormant in Regina.





	Toxic

She didn't expect she'd be training another student.  
  
This new Enchanted Forest was her chance at a happy ending, her chance at escaping that suffocating town. It helped that she got to be with Henry while she was at it. Regina bitterly mused that things had finally gone the way she wanted them to all those years ago, she had her son and Emma was out of the picture.  
  
What she never anticipated was a friendship growing between the two women. A friendship that blossomed into a relationship. A relationship that abruptly ended with the blonde dumping her for that worthless pirate. It still hurt so bad every time she saw Emma, it was as if her heart was being crushed over and over again as she helplessly watched.  
  
So she accepted that she wasn't built for romance. Daniel was taken from her and Emma left. Regina was a mother, a fighter, a sorceress, and damn fine looking. She didn't need that extra little vulnerability. Love lead to being hurt, and Regina was so tired of having her heart broken. So she cut that element out of her life and everything was going fine. Just fine.  
  
"Regina? Are you there?" Drizella asked, snapping her out of her own thoughts. The two were seated on a log, out in the forest on a beautiful sunny day. This girl, full of so much potential, was the most interesting part of this chapter in her story.  
  
"Sorry, I just have a lot on my mind." Regina replied. And that was the truth, she certainly did. Her mind was racing with thoughts about Henry and Emma and...Drizella.  
  
At first, Regina had thought she was nothing more than another threat. Another villain looking to hurt the only person she could count on in her life, the only thing that mattered. But Regina slowly uncovered something more within her. She saw herself in this girl, they were both hurt by their cruel mothers, they both had powerful magic, and all they were looking for was love. But while Regina was molded by her trauma into an evil woman, she was determined not to let Drizella go down the same path.  
  
"Coming up with more things to attack yourself with?" the younger woman asked wryly, a smirk on her face. Regina chuckled and smiled warmly at her student.  
  
"Say what you will, it was a good way to motivate you." she responded confidently. Drizella smiled and crossed her arms.  
  
"It's just because you know I...I like you." Drizella stuttered out, seeming to change her reply mid-sentence. Regina cursed herself for imagining what exactly she meant.  
  
As terrifying as it was, the girl had awakened something dormant in Regina.  
  
It couldn't have been affection. Drizella was Henry's age, she was young and vulnerable and foolish. Regina was a grown woman, one who had overcome her demons to grow into a hero, or at least something of the sort. There was no way she was infatuated with her pupil. Lust? Yes, it must have been that. There was a reason she cringed when her student commented that she wished her mother was like Regina. The way she looked at Drizella, with her beautiful brown eyes and her plump lips and her fit body, was entirely unmotherly.  
  
"I like you too, Drizella." the queen quickly replied, having realized that she was lost in thought for a few moments. She could have sworn that she saw a quick look of sadness on Drizella's face.  
  
"I know. Thank you, Regina." she said, taking her teacher's hand with a sincere smile. Regina returned the smile and squeezed her hand comfortingly. God, it was nice to have a friend. She missed having someone to rely on, someone to trust.  
  
"So, what are you going to do after this business with my mother is done?" Drizella asked, trying to change the subject as she put her hands in her lap. Regina thought it over, looking up at the sky. God, not even this question was easy.  
  
"I don't know, Drizella. I guess we're both lost." Regina sadly remarked. Her pupil looked over at her with a frown, intrigued at just what that meant.  
  
"Something to do with your mysterious backstory?" she inquired with a raised eyebrow. The dark haired woman chuckled, realizing that besides a comment she made about her own mother, Drizella didn't know that much about her past.  
  
"I suppose so. I...it's hard to explain." the sorceress answered. The both of them clearly had dozens of stories from their past, but neither of them asked the other to share. It was so much easier to laugh and banter and enjoy the cool summer air together than it was to talk about the difficult truths they had faced. So, although clearly curious, all she did was give Regina a supportive hug and whisper her reply. The older woman embraced her and shut her eyes peacefully.  
  
"I understand. You don't ever have to tell me something you don't want to. We're both safe here." Drizella cooed. Stop that, Regina thought. Stop being so damn sweet and understanding, stop tempting her with the thought that she just maybe had a crush on the girl.  
  
"Before I got here, I...I was in a relationship with someone." Regina explained. Drizella's eyes went wide, surprised that she was opening up, but she stayed silent. She wanted to be a good listener for her friend and mentor.  
  
"She was perfect. Well, as perfect as I could've hoped for." she began. "It was perfect for a while." she added sadly. The younger woman nodded in understanding.  
  
"But it slowly fell apart. I have...trust issues." Regina told Drizella, though she knew that was the understatement of the century. "That caused problems. It caused fights. But...I...I really thought we were working through them." she muttered, clearly struggling to continue the story. It had been months, she should've been over this. The terrible, aching knot in her stomach should've passed by now.  
  
"Then she left me. She tried to explain, but...I didn't want to hear it. I couldn't. It hurt too much." the normally intimidating queen admitted. Drizella softly rubbed Regina's back in silence, letting her talk. It was quite the shock for Regina to show any vulnerability. She just wasn't that type of person, she refused to be. Some things broke through that, though. Things like heartbreak.  
  
"So that's why I'm here. To support Henry, of course, but...also to get away. From her. From our home." Regina finished, tears in her eyes. Drizella frowned, obviously heartbroken for her friend.  
  
"I'm so sorry, Regina. That's awful." she said quietly, attempting to comfort Regina by softly squeezing her shoulder. The older woman chuckled bitterly and wiped her eyes.  
  
"It's fine. I'm done with love, I'm done with being hurt. I'm in control of my life now." the other woman told Drizella. She tried to project confidence, but it sounded more like she was assuring herself of that.  
  
"Not everyone is going to hurt you, Regina. Some people just want to help. They want to make your life better." Drizella said in response, the tone of her voice making it very clear that she wasn't just talking about any random person. No, she was very clearly trying to assure her teacher of something before she closed herself off for good. Regina's eyes went wide, shocked that not only did she have these feelings, but Drizella seemed to feel the same way.    
  
"Drizella...I..." Regina began, as if to protest what was happening. She needed to stop this immediately, before it could go any further. She just needed to shut this girl's little crush down-  
  
And then Drizella kissed her.  
  
All of her fears and concerns melted away as the younger woman locked lips with her. Regina wrapped her arms around Drizella, clinging to the newfound security and happiness she felt. They held the kiss for as long as they could, and then they kissed again, and again. These weren't chaste kisses either, they were filled with all the desperation and tension the both of them had built up. All of their time together, laughing and talking and teaching, learning to connect with someone else, had built to this moment.  
  
"Oh my." is all Regina could say as she grinned at her student, with the younger woman returning a satisfied smirk.  
  
"Needed to shut you up somehow." Drizella teased in a whisper. Regina mock gasped in reply and slapped her pupil's ass playfully.  
  
Maybe she could be happy with someone else after all.

* * *

She was wrong.  
  
They were happy, for a while. Content with spending time together and enjoying the upsides of a relationship. Drizella was so smart, so sharp-witted, so full of that biting sense of humor Regina had. Sometimes they'd just banter the night away and share laughs and smiles, sometimes they'd both be silent as they held hands and laid beneath the stars. Either way, Regina was loving every moment of it. Loving every moment with that beautiful and brilliant young woman.  
  
Beautiful and brilliant and vengeful.  
  
It started innocently enough. She let Drizella vent about her controlling mother, learned more about this woman who had done her wrong. That was what a good girlfriend did, and she was eager to try and help. But she could tell that no amount of comfort could erase all the pain inside of her, bubbling up. It just got worse and worse, until eventually she'd find Drizella gone for long periods of time, or so lost in thought that she might as well have been.  
  
"That's enough." Regina commanded as she walked through the doors. She might've been a hero now, but she was no fool. Although trust issues were a bitch otherwise, they had lead Regina to track Drizella to her mother's home.  
  
"R-Regina, what are you doing here?" Drizella stuttered, her concentration broken. Tremaine scoffed, seemingly amused by Regina coming to her rescue. With a glare, the queen used her magic to freeze the wicked woman.  
  
"You don't want to do this, Drizella. You are better than your mother. You're better than me." Regina promised Drizella, taking her hand. This simple act clearly made the other woman's composure waver.  
  
"I have to, Regina!" she replied, pulling her hand away and trembling. "I can't ever be happy while she's out there. And I want to be happy. With you." the young woman added desperately. God help her, Regina found that offer very tempting.  
  
"If you do this, you'll regret it for the rest of your life. I can't be with someone who's going down that dark path." the queen forced herself to say. This hurt like all hell, but she knew she had to do it. For the good of Drizella, one of the few rays of hope in her life.  
  
"Then we can't be together." Drizella quietly replied, tears in her eyes. She turned to her mother and wiped away her tears, putting on a forced smile. She couldn't watch Regina's heart break.  
  
"I'll be back for you, mother. Back with a curse that can make you suffer." the young woman promised, trying to hide the hurt she was feeling so deeply inside.  
  
"A curse is never worth the cost, Drizella." Regina assured her, hopelessly trying to reason with her former student and lover. As Drizella turned around, she slowly shook her head.  
  
"It is to me." Drizella whispered, before disappearing in a puff of purple smoke. Regina remembered why she had sworn off relationships, why she could never allow herself to rely on anyone. Now she knew it.  
  
This girl was toxic.

* * *

And then she woke up.  
  
As the drink Ivy poured her set in, her memories came flooding back. No, it wasn't Ivy who drugged her, it was Drizella. She wasn't Roni, the laid-back bartender, she was Regina, the evil queen. The woman who had suffered so much in her life, who had to relive losing Daniel, watching Emma leave, and failing the woman she promised herself she'd save. Since that fateful day the two split up, so much had happened. But as the two locked eyes, for a brief moment, they were right back where they started. Vulnerable and in love.  
  
"Welcome back, Regina." Drizella greeted her with a devilish smirk, quickly covering up her weak points. The young woman was determined to be wicked, to be confident in her irredeemability. So much like Regina all those years ago, when she swore to herself that she was the evil queen everyone saw her as.  
  
"Drizella..." Regina whispered sadly, still trying to adjust to everything that had happened. Her former pupil laughed in reply, leaning forward bravely. The queen partially wanted to grab her and kiss her, and the other half of her wanted to hurt her for how much damage she had done. Shake her and scream at her for going down the same stupid path that she had, leaving happiness behind for revenge.  
  
"Did you miss me?" the young woman sarcastically asked. The sad truth was that Regina actually had missed her. Ivy had meant nothing to Roni. But Drizella and Regina...they had history. So much of it was negative, but the happy moments they shared still haunted her.  
  
"I had just enough magic to wake you up." Drizella added, raising a small vial of memory potion. Smart girl. But all of her thoughts about her ex were pushed to the side when her phone rang, with a call from...Henry. Henry, her son. The most important person in her life. A little bit of the pain went away as a small smile came onto her face, her hand reaching to answer the phone.  
  
"I wouldn't answer that if I were you. Henry can't know about this." she warned Regina, stopping her right before she picked it up. Damn Drizella and her timing.  
  
"Then why the hell did you wake me up?" she snarled, showing a little bit of that ferocity the evil queen was known for. She had never snapped at Drizella before. She had been angry and sad and disappointed, but...she never let go of the love she had for that girl. And her former lover knew that, Regina could see the hurt on her face.  
  
"Your mind might be a little foggy from your nap, just give it a minute." Drizella told her. She was right, there were missing pieces of the puzzle. Missing pieces that slowly fell into place as she recalled just why Henry couldn't break the curse. As the shock overcame her face, Regina could see how satisfied her student was. She remembered being so damn smug when she thought she had won. No wonder Emma went after her so hard when they first met.  
  
"There it is. It's all coming back." the young woman went on, watching as Regina's anger turned into sadness. How could Drizella have done this to her son? How could this sweet girl be pushed so far as to become her enemy? She tried to keep up the facade of pride, but Regina could see it folding. They were both hurt, and sad, and exhausted. It was too late to reason with her, Regina told herself. The two were on opposite sides, and now she really knew it.  
  
"You should be proud!" Drizella told her, downing another drink. "You know you're a great teacher when the student surpasses the master." she explained. Fine then, if Drizella was going to put on her evil face, Regina could do the same.  
  
"What do you want? You want a gold star?" Regina growled, her voice charged with tension as she tried to take her opponent down a notch. She certainly wanted to give Drizella something, but now probably wasn't the time. "Or did you just wake me to gloat?" she asked angrily.  
  
"I woke you up because I need your help." the girl told her. An increasingly small part of her body hoped that she really was asking for help. Help fixing her life, fixing her damaged heart. But she knew no such thing would happen, at least not today. "I am on the verge of showing my mother what true suffering is." she added. In that moment, Regina didn't care to ask what she needed. She was tired of this, tired of her obsession tearing them apart.  
  
"Still with your mother? Think of all the people you've hurt because of this!" she snapped. "We could've been together, Drizella! You promised you wouldn't hurt me!" she shouted, tears in her eyes. It was too hard to harden her heart around her ex and act like the villain she used to be. This was no ordinary villain she could take care of and move on with her life after. What she had with her was personal.  
  
"You hurt me, Regina!" Drizella snarled, slamming her glass down. "I've always been alone and I thought you were different! I thought you would help me, not abandon me when I needed you the most!" she yelled. They were both so emotionally charged that they'd never admit it, but they both knew that the other was partially right. They had failed each other. They took the easy way out.  
  
"So I have to stop Henry and Cinderella from falling in love...that's the only way he lives?" she inquired sadly as the anger in both of them died down. Without a word, her newfound enemy nodded.  
  
"It shouldn't be too hard for the evil queen, right?" Drizella asked bitterly. "After all, breaking hearts is...kind of what you're best at." she added with a spiteful smile before walking away. Out of her bar, out of her heart.  
  
As Regina sobbed alone, she knew that Drizella was right.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> I've planned on doing a "Once Upon a Time" fic for a while now, but this particular ship (which is all too rare) really caught my attention. There's no way it'll ever happen, but I thought it'd make for an interesting read.
> 
> I hope you stick around for more and have a happy new year!


End file.
